The Importance of Finding Your Mom Village

A new family favorite for us is the Disney Pixar Short entitled “Lava”. My 3 year old is definitely a music lover and is very captured by the beautiful Hawaiian music and loving song lyrics. My son is speech delayed and doesn’t have more than 10 words down, but he is great at imitating sounds and acting movies out. He went through a Coco phase where he would act out the whole performance of “Un Poco Loco”, which would bring a smile to anyone’s face. He loves dancing and singing and even closes his eyes to really emphasize the emotions and energy of the songs. My little actor, I like to say. This morning when we woke up, I played the Lava song throughout the house. My son so sweetly sang the lyrics in his own beautiful way. At the ending it repeats “I Lava You” three times and I was able to record him so sweetly singing that ending and it melted my heart. I sent that video to my husband, mom and sister and shared it with my husband’s family too, who live across the country. It is great when we get to share moments like this with our immediate family whether they are near or far.

I also decided to share this video with one of my Facebook groups for moms with speech delayed kids. I very quickly was flooded with positive comments praising my son and a bunch of moms liking the video showing their support and love for my son and his singing. I thought about it, these are people that I do not know, but who UNDERSTAND just how important a little singing clip like this means for me. These are moms who don’t know my son, but who are familiar with our journey, because many of their journey’s have been the same. It is not the “likes” I get that make me want to share a video like this, it is the support and understanding and acknowledgement of how great something like this is to me that is important.

If I shared this on my private FB page where I have an abundance of family and friends and even acquaintances, I would probably get some likes and comments, but most of them (besides really close knit ones) would really not understand why my son singing three words that are barely understandable would be such a big deal and so sweet to me. They do not know what kind of journey we have been through or how much we work on his speech on a daily basis to end up with these three words. They do not understand the hours of evaluations and therapy sessions and paperwork I do on a regular basis to ensure we have the right services in place for my son, which helped us to get to singing those three words. But the moms in my speech delayed kids Facebook page do, they understand, and they are right there with me, feeling my joy and relief, knowing that any progress is great progress. They get it.

Having a mom group that you can connect with in regards to anything in your life is important. This doesn’t mean just a Facebook Group or another online platform. This could be a group of friends or other moms in the community. Maybe you are friendly with moms from your church or child’s school or daycare. Regardless where you find your community, I believe that it is important to have one. I do not belong to a church and my oldest is almost three, so hasn’t been in school yet. I also don’t have too many close friends that live nearby or that I talk to daily. That is why finding my mom groups on Facebook has been so helpful to me. In fact, I have met several other mom friends in my area through a Facebook mom-group page.

I belong to a couple of local mom groups in my area and I connect with those moms almost on a daily basis. The Toddler support group that I am in consists of mostly local moms who can seek advice, support, vent and crack jokes about our beloved yet crazy toddler parenting experiences. The other local group that I am actively involved in is our Village Gifting group where us moms are there to help one another by “gifting” items to each other under the mindset that there is more than enough to go around. This group has been a magical experience allowing us moms to support one another and ensure everyone’s needs are met. Whether we are gifting food, clothes, toys for our kids or even furniture and fun accessories, this group is all about being there for one another and blessing the moms within our community. I have benefited so much by both gifting a receiving goods from this group. I often will gift something at least once a week, if not more, knowing that if I am not using it, someone else can. I have received so many wonderful gifts as well from a Cars toddler bed to kids shoes, to a computer bag and wall decor for my home. There really is no limit to the needs that are fulfilled in this community. And when I say “community”, I really mean it. This is not the same as a “Buy, sell, trade” or “Buy nothing” group. This village is a community of parents that has a wonderful admin team, who ensure all members abide by our philosophy about generosity and abundance.

The beauty of any of these groups, especially my local ones, is that I feel supported, encouraged and safe expressing my thoughts and needs. I do not feel judged and only see moms supporting one another, not bashing each other in these groups. Not all mom groups are the same, there are those that can have a somewhat negative or judgmental vibe. Therefore, it is important for you to find mom groups that jive with your personality, interests, and philosophies. There are so many mom groups out there with so many different interests and purposes, and if you do not feel like you can find one that you are looking for, don’t be afraid to start one yourself! When I had my first son, I wanted to meet other working moms in my area who I could meet up with on weekends and evenings. However, all the mom groups in my area only met on weekdays and during normal working hours. So I decided to create my own Facebook page for working moms. That group has grown to over 130 members so far, so obviously those moms were looking for a group like that too. All it takes is someone to take initiative and create a group that fits their needs. Chances are, if it is something you are looking for, other moms may be looking for it too!

Whether it is for support, advice, community, or gifting, it is important for every mom to find herself a mom village!